Perfectly Imperfect (You've Got The Love)

It's one of those days around here.

It's Monday. And I'm tired.

We spend a whirl-wind weekend in the Bay Area. It included two very long drives, two bouts of screaming by a overly tired/ hungry infant (both at times when I couldn't stop or pull over), a GPS that got me lost, extra late nights, and extra exerted energy that's required when traveling with a baby.

It also included lots and lots of family and family friends who were meeting Birdie for the first time. In the midst of enjoying each other's company I tried my best to push away the thought that we will have to part eventually. Visits are never long enough.

It included an extremely short visit with friends who are our surrogate family. Why can't we make it a law that you have to live next door to all of your bestest friends, no matter where life takes you? Seeing them together reminded me how much I miss D. The little kisses, the playfulness, the cuddles. Ouch... I miss that.

It includes a nasty sinus infection. Pressure, runny nose, and gunk of all sorts. I don't really have a voice and if I can squeak anything out I sound like a teenage boy. Hot tea, honey, a netti pot are barely helping.

It includes a Birdie- girl who is tired from being tired. Who wants to nurse more than usual and who wakes the second I put her down. Who graced me with a huge blow out that spread to my already dirty yoga pants. .... Yep... still wearing them.

It includes two wound-up doggies that were angels at the kennel over the weekend but are making me pay today for their built up energy. Duly noted, dogs.

All of this makes one hot mess mama who is just tired. Who wants to shower but is just too lazy. Who is picking fights with D over the details of moving amongst other things. I know he's just as tired as I am.

And, then, in the midst of all this.

Her smile.

You win, little bird.

Let's go do some serious cuddling.

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This Time

E, C and I in Yosemite around this time last year. 

This time last year... I broke down emotionally during dinner with my mom at a restaurant. It was hard to watch my mom find words of comfort to make everything all better.

This time last year... I had a really fun visit with e and c. (pictured) And was secretly wishing they'd start dating.

This time last year... I had random, crazy reaction to a medication I've taken before.

This time last year... all of the hard work that d did was wiped away in one injury.

This time last year... I kept telling myself over and over and over that everything happens for a reason. (right?)

This time last year... we were getting ready to move back to Oregon.

This time last year... we were surprised (understatement) to learn that a little bird was soon to be on her way.


This time... I am the happiest I've probably ever been.

This time... I'm counting down the days until I get to see e and c again. (11 to go!) And I'm over the moon, tickled, thrilled that they're now married.

This time... all of d's hard work and sacrifice paid off in a huge way.

This time... all I can think about is how things happen for a reason, and someone else knows of a bigger plan than I do.

This time... we're starting to plan our move to our next station in Mobile, Alabama.

This time... I have an almost 3-month-old (what!?!) birdie sitting contently in my lap as I type this, chewing on her soft, chubby hands.


What a difference a year makes.

As of Late

1. a backyard friend
2. crocheting a couple beanies for an upcoming photo shoot
3. cockatoo hair
4. turns out mila-bird just doesn't like paci's.
5. fall has arrived.
6. a new-to-me phone. love.
7. halloween love from nana and papa
8. a dapper pup.

Halloween

Once October snuck into the picture I started envisioning a trip to the local pumpkin patch with Mila-bird for her first special holiday outing. I was determined to find a cute pumpkin for my little pumpkin. I wanted her festively dressed so I could take 10,000 pictures to mark the occasion (below are a fraction of what I actually took)... because that's what mama's do, right? Well... the pumpkin patch was no longer in business so we settled for a place on a corner. We brought Grandma and cousin Ky along for the fun.

Since D is away I decided to not purchase a costume or carve pumpkins. We'll wait until next year when we can really celebrate together. Instead, Birdie got a couple Halloween outfits to celebrate the day. 

Some doggies were not too happy about having to stay inside while I did a quick Bird-shoot. Since my main subject was completely over her picture being taken for the millionth time I decided to add them into the mix. 

Cousin Ky came over for some trick-or-treating. Mila-bird slept most of the time while Grandma and I went along for the candy to see the decorated houses. 

 Ky dressed as Sally with Zero the Dog. Both from the Nightmare Before Christmas. 

 Snoozin' away

Miss Bird lookin' like her mama when she was a baby!  

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I came across one of our engagement pictures today. 13 weeks of missin' this handsome guy. We're both doing as well as can be, considering. I'm looking forward to being in the count down phase of things but we're not there yet. I can't wait until I can FINALLY get our first picture- together- as a family of three! 

Poop Post, Part Deux

I wanted to do an update to my last post about cloth diapering. In that post I stated that we were using- at one point- four different cloth diapers: Baby City, ProRaps, Fuzzibunz, and KaWaii. Mila-bird grew out of ProRaps within 3 weeks as the size that I had was for newborns only. That left Baby City, Fuzzibunz and KaWaii.

Since my last post the Baby City diapers (pictured above) gave out on me. While doing a wash I noticed that the inside of the diaper was de-laminating. I tried a higher tumble dry but had no luck. De-lam can happen in two ways: the diaper was not being dried at the proper temperature or there was a manufacturing issue. I KNOW that the first option was not the problem as I line dried these. The second option is the issue since these diapers are not a name brand, came straight from the manufacturer in China and cost me about $12 for 9 of them. I knew this prior to purchasing them but some people had good, long-lasting results so I figured I'd give them a whirl. I will miss the fun colors, stretchy close tabs and how fast they line dry. I will not miss the leaks, cheap material, lack of inserts (didn't come with any) and the bulkiness of the diaper.

Bottom line: I wouldn't purchase these again and would not recommend them for someone who is new to cloth diapering.

This also means that I'm officially done using my prefolds. (Pictured below) I was using these as inserts for the Baby City diapers. Sure, I can still use them as inserts as needed but, for now, they will remain packed away for the next baby to use.

So, it was now back to deciding which diaper to invest in. In the end I went with buying 12 more KaWaii Heavy Duty One Size diapers. (A $72 purchase) That brings my total diaper stash to 18 KaWaii diapers and 6 Fuzzibunz One Size Elite.

Ultimately I decided to go with this brand for the price per diaper, ease of use, washing instructions, and overall performance on Birdie. Each diaper came with 2 micofiber inserts. I still like my Fuzzibunz diapers but I'm starting to question if they'll fit Birdie's booty until she's about 2 years old... they look really tiny compared to KaWaii.

Here's a few extra thoughts that have popped into my head:

- It's important to wash according the the manufacturer's instructions but you can still vary how you wash within that. How one mama washes her baby's diapers may not work for you. Mila-bird is a heavy wetter so I do more soaks, extra rinses, and sun bleach to keep the ammonia smell/ build up in check.

- Cloth diapers RARELY produce a diaper rash. If there's a diaper rash situation one might want to look into what you're eating (if breastfeeding) or how good of a wash your diapers are getting. Usually one needs to strip the diapers completely as something is building up on them. The only rash Birdie has had was from when I was downing fruit Odwalla drinks everyday. Once I stopped her rash disappeared.

- Cloth diapered babies need to be changed more frequently than disposable. Disposables are designed to wick moisture away from the baby as they're in the diaper, making it last longer. Cloth diapers are not made to do that- babies feel what they're sitting in. I change Birdie's diaper every 2-3 hours no matter what as it's usually pretty done by then. Some families need to change every hour, hence the need for so many cloth diapers. (Minimum of 24 is recommended in a stash) With my new KaWaii purchase I've pushed my washing from every other day to every two days.

- Cloth diapers are much bulkier than disposable, especially when you add in extra inserts. For Birdie, I've added two inserts to her Fuzzibunz for better performance... but it doesn't mean it's lasts longer. I stick to one insert for her KaWaii diapers. Because they're bulkier you might have to go up a size in clothing, particularly outfits with little pants like this:

This Carter's outfit is a 6 month size. The onesie will last her awhile as there's still length left to growing into. The pants may not last as long depending on how she grows. We'll have to see. She still fits into some 3 month onesies but in little pants I have to buy a 6 month size to allot extra bulk from her diaper. (And maybe it's just me but I've noticed that Carter's clothes run a little big.)

Cloth diapering isn't for everyone. It can seem very overwhelming, a little odd and even gross to some. My posts on this topic are merely for those who have inquired about how it works. Bottom line- we love how well it works for our family.

Bird in the Water

Mila-bird and I waited anxiously since the day you were born to get you in the water but mama had to wait for her c-section scar to heal finally joined an infant swim class that meets once a week. Sadly, it's in the afternoons during the work week. This mama was worried that she wouldn't get any pictures of her little birdie dipping in the warm water for her first time.

As luck would have it we ventured back to the pool this evening for a birthday party. I threw on our suits, handed Grammy the camera and gave her strict orders to keep shooting until we were all done. Birdie looooves anything to do with water and enjoys being dragged around the pool. She's even been underwater a few times... D would be proud!

Just like after her bath, Mila-bird gets very, very giggly... 

(umm... could you look anymore like your daddy in this picture?!) 

... Just before she takes a nice, cozy nap from all that swimming. 

Weeks Turn To Months

By The Numbers

Month: 2 (8 weeks) 

Weight: 14.1 pounds (Off the charts)

Length: 23 1/2 inches (Off the charts)
Head: 16 inches (95th percentile)
Hair: Still plenty of it although you've lost a bit. Your hair is lighter than it was at birth. It's an exact combination of my dark brown and D's strawberry. Oh, and it sticks up like a cockatoo.
Eyes: They've become a lot lighter but they're still blue. Light blue in the center and dark at the edges. 

Feedings: About every 3- 4 hours, depending on your mood. You nurse anywhere from 1-2 hours straight just before you conk out for the night. 

Naps: This mama lets you decide when you want to eat and sleep but it seems you like to have 3, 2-hour -ish long naps a day. Between those you have random cat naps lasting from 15 minutes to an hour. 

Wakings: After you're down for the night you typically wake up about 2 times to feed. Thankfully they're pretty quick ones! 

Size: 0-3 months is very, very snug, 3 months fits you now and you're rapidly growing into 6 month clothing. Your mama is not sure she likes this whole growing thing that you've been doing. 

You continue to be a very, very content baby. Your cries only mean that mama isn't fast enough getting food in your tummy. (Unless mama accidentally drops the remote on your head. Apparently you don't like that.) You always throw out about 5 warning sounds and start stomping one foot before the crying begins. Tears started to show up a couple weeks ago which is the saddest sight to see. You've always been a champion eater but now you like to stop in the middle to have "chats" with me. 

You've mastered smiling and cooing "o's." You become a wild baby whenever you're getting your diaper or clothes changed, throwing out extra smiles, loud laughs, and big kicks. Your little "laugh" sounds more like a loud gasp for air, and is always accompanied by a shoulder shrug. You love to sit up and love to stand with lots of help. You're known around this house to have wild head movements but you're really starting to have more control over it. You tolerate tummy time especially now that you can hold your head up higher. 

My little birdie is quite the night owl. Bedtime for you is anywhere between 10:30pm- 11:30pm. You sleep next to your mama in bed and end up hogging most of it. In the early hours you make lots of little squeaks and sighs while you sleep. My favorite thing is when you wake up really early in the morning and greet me with lots of smiles and soft coos. And, sometimes, loud farts. Classy.